


Outlaws of Love

by FanFicReader01



Category: Poets of the Fall
Genre: Homophobia, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pain, Rare Ship, i pained me writing this, jari and jani deserve better, potf doesnt exist, ugly homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2017-02-15
Packaged: 2018-09-24 18:24:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9778871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanFicReader01/pseuds/FanFicReader01
Summary: It might’ve been one of the coldest Helsinki nights Jani had ever experienced when he got a midnight visit from a dear friend of his.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Based upon: Outlaws of Love by Adam Lambert. Lol, You could just listen to this song and imagine stuff on your own without this fic xD
> 
> Sorry if this one was quickly written, I was tired and really wanted to post this one :P  
> SIDENOTE: The band PoTF doesn't exist. Jani and Jari do not know the other bandmembers and neither do they know the bassist and the drummer

**_Oh, nowhere left to go_ **

**_Are we getting closer? Closer?_ **

 

They were running. Running from street to street, from city to city. Running away from the authorities.

They were running away from their past.

 

\--

Jari, a youthful man. A young drummer who had a bright future ahead.

Until one secret ruined it all. One, little, innocent secret had shattered his colorful life into a million pieces that could not be repaired anymore. Not even with the strongest glue in the world.

Luckily, there was someone who remained at his side, even when the world around him had fallen down.

 

Jani, a skilled bassist with a heart of gold. He too, had a future to hold onto until the secret was revealed and there was nothing left anymore for him or his friend and lover.

\--

 

‘Keep running! I’ll catch up to you in a sec!’ Jani panted as he was getting tired of all the running.

His partner was ahead of him, he could catch the train if he wanted to.

The younger man jumped into the wagon and stuck his hand out for the bassist. ‘You can do it!’, he encouraged and just in time Jani caught up and gripped Jari’s hand.

Both men were breathing heavily as they finally sat in the train. Their heads rested against the wood and they looked each other in the eyes.

 ‘Where are we going?’ Jari asked.

‘I don’t know. We’re just moving on. Until we get kicked out eventually’, Jani sighed.

‘Just like always’ Jari mumbled and stared at his backpack which had been a lot less heavy since some bastards stole the most important things.

 

 

The two men spent two days in the train that was actually meant for cattle. Two days before they got kicked out.

 ‘No stowaways on my train!’ a brusque man had yelled before he forcibly kicked the former musicians out of the train.

Jani and Jari rolled off a steep hill. Both of them got hurt in the process. Once again, they lost everything. Their backpacks were still on that cursed train.

 

Jari cried. Due to the rain, Jani couldn’t see it, but he could hear it. Hearing Jari sob was worse than being homeless.

He hugged his lover and tried to share his body heat with him.

 ‘Sometimes, I just want to die. Just so I can finally rest’, Jari whimpered.

Jani felt his heart ache and pressed the younger man closer to him.

 ‘You don’t. How could I live without you?’

‘We should both die together. There’s nothing left in this world for us anyway. No one needs us.’

‘Please, Jari. Don’t say such things.’

‘You know it’s the truth.’

 

**_No, all we know is "No"_ **

**_Nights are getting colder, colder_ **

 

They had a horrible night in those darkened woods. Although there were lots of trees, it didn’t give the men the cover they needed.

The rain didn’t spare them and soon they were already soaked in the cold water.

Jani had found them a spot on a small bed of moss. It would be more comfortable than the harsh dirt.

He placed one of his jackets first before laying down. Then he let Jari rest on him. When he wrapped his hand around the smaller man’s back, he felt his cramped fingers tingle.

When Jari laid his head against Jani’s cheek, he couldn’t feel the difference. For the first time in his life he prayed to the gods for he was afraid they might not wake up anymore.

 

While he tried to fall asleep, Jani thought about _that_ day. The day that ruined them both.

 

***

 

**_Hey, tears all fall the same_ **

**_We all feel the rain_ **

****

_The bassist was pacing up and down in his house. He was restless. Why did the heating of his house had to break down during the winter? Around this hour of the day, there were no electricians available so Jani had to wait till the next morning._

_He had collected all the blankets he could find, and stored them on his bed. He was making himself some midnight snack when he heard someone knocking on his door._

_He wondered who it was. Why would anyone visit him at this hour? It was already 2 PM._

_First, he wanted to ignore the unwanted visitor. But the person on the other side of the door kept on knocking._

_Finally, Jani gave in and scampered towards his front door. He was about to complain but then he saw who it was. His heart broke at the sight._

_It was the drummer. That kid._

_His face, dear god, his beautiful face. All beaten up. He had a black eye, his glasses were broken. The younger man’s lips were blemished and both cheeks seemed to be bruised. He also had a bloody nose._

_The blood was fresh. Just like the tears running down Jari’s cheeks._

_Jani didn’t hesitate to pull the drummer closer to him to hug him. Jari was shuddering uncontrollably._

_‘God, what happened to you?’ Jani whispered._

_When the bassist looked behind Jari, he saw a large backpack standing on the pavement._

_‘Please, come in. I’ll get your backpack’, the bassist mumbled as he let go of the other man._

_Jari slightly nodded as he entered the living room._

_‘Let’s go upstairs. I’m making a nest of blankets. Darn heating broke down’ Jani explained the coldness._

_Jani had taken care of the drummer’s bruises before he wrapped Jari up in a lot of blankets until only the younger man’s face was visible._

_After he had made sure Jari’s shivering had ended, the bassist went to the kitchen to return with warm milk for the both of them. The drummer loosened the wrappings so he could receive the warm mug._

_‘I-, they, they found out. About me, about us’, Jari finally dared to speak up._

_Jani, who sat next to him, stroked the younger man’s back in a soothing motion as he listened._

_‘They were furious. I had to immediately pack my stuff and, and-’, words started to fail the kid as he started to sob again._

_‘I-, I’ve lost them all’, he wept. Jani carefully removed some hairs out of Jari’s face and looked him in the eyes. He whispered: ‘No. You didn’t lose anyone. They lost you.’ There was bitterness in the bassist’s voice when he imagined how it had happened. How could anyone disown their kid that easily?_

_‘I’m here for you, Jari. I love you’, Jani said and pressed a kiss on the drummer’s head. ‘You can count on me. I won’t leave you.’_

_‘Thank you.’_

****

**_We can't change..._ **

 

_Jani didn’t fall asleep until he made sure Jari was alright. When the kid was sleeping, Jani was pondering in his mind._

_How could Jari’s parents hate him? Because Jari was in love? Because he liked men instead of women?_

_Jani had never understood the hatred against homosexuality. It was just an expression of love. One expression of many. How could someone hate a person who was in love? Shouldn’t be that the most beautiful thing in the world?_

_Apparently, Jari’s parents thought otherwise._

_Then it came to his mind that it could also be his age. He was, after all, a few years older than the drummer. But then again, you can’t just disown someone for loving someone else._

_The very fact that_ he _was the reason Jari got disowned, hurt him. Maybe he should’ve turned his back when Jari made his confession. But he couldn’t. Because he too was in love._

_And that last fact, couldn’t be changed. Never._

_***_

**_Everywhere we go we're looking for the sun_ **

**_Nowhere to grow old, we're always on the run_ **

****

Jani and Jari _did_ wake up the next morning. Their clothes were plastered against their cold skin.

Their bodies were still trembling and aching when they got up.

 ‘I suppose we keep walking’ Jari had said.

Jani had nodded in silence. They walked and walked. There seemed to be no end. The forest was huge.

During their journey, Jani kept thinking about the things Jari had said the previous night.

 _We should both die together._ _There’s nothing left in this world for us anyway. No one needs us._

Although those words had pained him, they were true for a part. Jari had no home to return to and neither did Jani.

 

***

_After the renter found out about Jari staying with Jani, the man wasn’t too happy about it. And when he knew about their relationship he threw the two men out._

_They both ended up on the streets with no support whatsoever. Jani got fired and had to leave the band he played in._

_Jari, obviously, couldn’t continue his studies. And so they fled_.

 

***

 

And yet, Jani didn’t want to die. Not like this. He didn’t want Jari’s pale, weakened face to be the last thing he saw. He wanted to see a happy, cheerful face in front of him.

He didn’t want to feel Jari’s meager hands against his own scraggy body as they died in each other’s embrace.

He wished he could offer his lover more than only body heat and meaningless promises of a better life.

He wished so much.

Jani wished they could live together in a nice and warm home with friends on their side. Not this life of a refugee.

 

***

 

**_They say we'll rot in Hell, but I don't think we will_ **

**_They've branded us enough, "Outlaws of Love"._ **

 

Jani hated to admit it, but Jari got beaten more than once after that horrible night when he had appeared on Jani’s doorstep.

He and Jari had to endure much during their “new” lives on the streets.

Not only because they were “filthy dirt” on the street, but also because they were men in love _with each other_. It was sinful, frowned upon and they were damned.

 

Beaten up in alleyways, harassed on the streets, spit at. The list could go on and on.

Yet Jari and Jani remained strong. They kept holding hands, kept embracing each other during the hard days, kept loving each other.

 

Jani was sure of it. One day, their love would conquer. His bond with the drummer could never be broken. They couldn’t be separated.

Even if the whole world hated them, they’d stay strong. They could take the world. They’d _defy_ this wicked world.

He bet they could destroy this hateful world if they wanted.

 

***

 

**_Scars make us who we are_ **

**_Hearts and homes are broken, broken_ **

 

Jani and Jari had made it through the harsh winter.

They sat at the riverside. Finally washing themselves after months.

Jari was washing Jani’s back with the cool water. It seemed like the dirt had become one with the bassist’s back. Jari kept scrubbing and scrubbing. When some mud came off, it revealed thin skin covered in scars.

Jari was sure he had lots of scars too. From the violence they had to endure, from the many times they got thrown out of trains, from the merciless weather. And some scars from more tender, but passionate moments.

 

**_Far, we could go so far_ **

**_With our minds wide open, open_ **

****

Both men could’ve been musicians. Famous musicians.

They could have the world at their feet. They could have a home, a real bed to sleep in.

They could have so much.

 

But Jani knew he had Jari at least. As long as the world didn’t take his lover away, he could still breathe.

He could still go on. One more day.

 

**_They say we'll rot in Hell, but I don't think we will_ **

**_They've branded us enough, "Outlaws of Love_** ".

 

‘We’re looking for new artists to join us on our musical adventure.’

  ‘Are you asking us?’

‘Yep! The way you guys play those instruments. It makes me breathless. It’s so heartfelt. It reminds me of my friend. My lover, he plays the guitar like an angel. So, will you join us?’

 One look. One nod.

‘It’d be an honor.’

 

**_Outlaws of Love_ **

**_Outlaws of Love_ **

**_Outlaws of Love_ **

**_Outlaws of Love_ **

**Author's Note:**

> No real people were harmed in the process nor do i mean any harm towards the bandmembers :P  
> I made sure PoTF didn't exist in this AU on purpose. I couldn't write hateful, not supporting bandmembers okay? So guess what, the other bandmembers are the solution this time!


End file.
